Welcome To Patty's blog

i spent my last day on my 25th years old by looking in the mirror and see my own reflection. suddenly a lot of question come out of nowhere. what did i achieve in my 25 years life.what i have. why i still here. when is my time. what. why. how. when. and so on. feel so tired and blur. my mood is unstable. how ever, thank to God..i still live in this world. i still have family and friend and last but least i have job that can satisfy my need not my dream. so my life is not empty after all. being a human i think is normal to be greedy sometimes and jealous to other. dont know what to write anymore, i think tonight i'm gonna pray for my birthday. never give up on miracles. there is hope in every thing cuz there is light in the dark.  

I would like to talk about the fake people, plastic face or people that wear a mask in their daily life. Wow, for the first time I meet the master of disguise. Me look so innocent kan. My mom said, there more people like that in the world so dont terlebih suprise becomes that kind people are the most common people that u will meet along your life so always be prepared. How?and When?... anytime and anywhere. DTA (Dont Trust Anybody). Ok thats all for the advice. Back to my story, there one or two people that i knew were very nice people and caring for other but They Were Not. They will stab in ur back anytime they get chance. They will do anything to make sure their image dont ruin (there is now wrong about that) but dont ever put ur blame to other. Its so so not nice to do. U mistake, take it, your job, do it, dont make any excuses or point your finger to other because other can show their middle finger to you. Ur people are still safe and alive in this world not because you were aweso

people said we will became close when we stay together in one house for a long period. somehow i believe that but when i face the reality, that 'said' are not fully correct. i didnt know my mistake or whyshe hate me or thats the way she are. my roomate @ housemate that i live together almost two years became stranger to me. she took away my trust just as she move out from the house. make it more dramatic, today when i saw her with her friend, she just ignore me and pretend that she doesnt see me at all. thats the way our ending. for me, i just let it go and make it one of lesson in my journey. what a strange world that i live for almost 26 years.

Never thought that I'm gonna lost someone that I love, One by one, the one I love leave me behind, Until there is no one that wait or beside me, Thats when I realize that, I walk alone in this journey, Feel so tired doing all things alone, Feel the road is no end, No hope, Feel useless because got that feeling there is no one waiting for me in the end of the road, Really feel wanna stop this journey and stop walking, But then I open the Bible, Read the word from God, 'Who said Ur walk alone, who said there is no one wait for you, who said there is no one beside you, God, Jesus Christ is always beside and wait, Still have faith for me in the end of the road, He said, if I feel tired, just stop a while and continue walking, But never give up, There so much to learn in this journey, The obstacle, the sadness, the sorrow, The title of our lesson, Have faith in God, Never stop believing, God, forgive me for I sometimes doesn't have faith, in you and myse

every week, Monday is the very dislike day for me..well, i got so much relax and fun in Sunday but have to come on Monday to work. and the worst Monday of all, today got an audit..means there will someone or like judges come to evaluate my work but its not my work all this time. its somebody work that i have to temporary replace while she absent. all the #$%^& file that i really don't understand will be my job and the file is important for the audit. so really benci today monday. i feel like want to take leave but orang bilang sudah tanggungjawab, running away its not solution. so apapun happen today, kena marah ka kena tengok lain macam ka kena cakap nda pandai buat keja ka, wat ever la kan...i will accept it with a swollen face. i hope the best. its not that I'm so brave or what but i believe God will be by my side when its my hardest day. so think of that my mood became calm. smile and silence is the perfect act to do right now. ^^

i really feel bored right now so i'm going to write about anything. bisuk is saturday and yet i dont plan anything maybe i just stay in my house, watching tv or kacau somebody. then sunday, going to church before that attend sunday class. i think i'm to old for sunday school but what to do, its  my fault because tidak finish kan everything when i'm still teenager. between that time is my hardest year. when i look back right now, i feel that myself on 5 years ago really brave and strong. i really shock why i survive that year but i think because i know God is always beside me. thats why i still here and living a fine life. not an awesome life or prefect but just nice life. i got family that always stick together even we seldom meet each other, i got my friend and i mean a lot of a good friend then i got job that can make my life go on. so i think i live a very normal life and thats how i think how God make my life. His plan is so wisdom and perfect on His own way. 'expe

i never go to semporna and never watch regatta lepa in my whole life. so i take this chance to go with my office member and see my own eyes how regatta lepa are.well, its more fun watching this lepa and go there, rather than see on tv. walaupun, its hot over there with people that so ramai but still i enjoyed it.maybe other will not feel teruja or rasa macam besa ja but for me, i really feel so 'wow' and 'whats???'.just imagine people can sleep very well in a boat or perahu. for me, its so weird but when i read the history about the bajau laut or pelahu, then i realize there are many interesting thing that beyond our ordinary life in this world. no need to go overseas just to see a new thing or new stuff.just beside beside our kampung or daerah. the very susah in going anywhere is when u have to duduk in the bus for about 10 hour, its speechless. ur butt, ur body and ur mind will not bekerjasama and u have to feel sengsara until u reach the destination. some said that w

i just feel so leave out, so being throw out of the group, a little shame and till now my cheek is still feel hot. why people invite and then take back the invitation. u think money can buy anything. just give the money than problem solved or did my face look like i want just money. do i. what ever, that incidents really make my day so frustrated.

my sis that always try to look beautiful and pretty with makeup and so on. she alway try to be as young as possible. but for me, my sis is the always the same, beauty and young. frankly, she look much young and beautiful than me. if i ever told her like this, she must said that i'm lying. when i said that why she try hard to look young or beautiful, she answer that i will understand when i reach her age. maybe i will act like, maybe. who knows what future that we had. so to my sis, even though u dont have blog but still i wanna said that u are beautiful and im proud to be your younger sister. ^.^

monday: eat,work,sleep tuesday: eat,work,sleep wednesday: eat,work,sleep thursday: eat,work,sleep friday: eat,work,sleep saturday: sleep all day and eat when wake up sunday: go to church My daily life look really boring and lonely.... -_- trying to try something new but it always end the same routine...

from now i gonna active my blog..so be prepare cuz im gonna rock this unlimited world~~